Dealing with a toddler can be a whole of handful works. Often I heard many moms feel like they have failed themselves on leading their kids to the right direction, or must I say their desired direction. The more you try to redirect your toddler, the more you’ll get frustrated and exhausted.
I must admit that there are many times I feel the same way on one of my days leading M. But considering myself as a working mom, part of me feel really proud on the way M turned out to be as good as how I’m always expecting him to be. He’s sweet and lovely. He doesn’t hit or bite (well, sometimes he’ll bite me gently just because of over excited, but nothing harmful really).
Set a limit clearly, calmly and early
M has always been ahead compare to other kids on his age. Even when it comes to his toddlerness. As soon as after his first birthday, it become more obvious to me that he has developed more complex thought and feelings. I was a stay at home mom until M almost reached 2 years old. So I had more time to set limits as early as possible. Persistence is another challenging task for every parents.
Create your own sacred words or songs or moves
M loves special words or song or sentence or moves that only me and him using it. Over the time he will just ask me to repeat it over and over and over again. This is a good begining to lead your toddler, by showing him that following mommy is gonna be fun (andd fine)!
Give them options, not instructions
Toddler hates instructions. At this age, they like to show off their prerogratives and their right to choose. As a good mom, we don't fight them, we facilitate them. Having options to decide is also good for them to practice their sense of leadership and independence.
Give more attention to the details
There are many details that we need to know about this little creature with a unique characteristic. Observe more on what they like and dislike, what can make them iritated, excited, scared etc. Knowing their particular details will make us know what to do with them.
Set routines, not rules!
Rules are there to be broken, but routines are there to be repeated. This is applied not only to us as adult, but also to toddlers. They never meant to break the rules, because basically they never get the idea of being ruled. But routines is different, it sets them to catch the regularities as what they're expecting. Oya, haven't I mentioned that at their age, toddler loves to repeat things, it makes them feel secure knowing that things happen as what they're expecting.
Give more examples, the good ones!
When they said that mom is the key to the better future, well they're right! As the one whose spend most of their time with, toddler watch and observe every single thing that you do. As your bigest fans, they love to follow the things that you do. So always give good examples anytime anywhere.
Have fun and don’t take it so seriously
Toddlers are just toddlers. They're innocent and all out from the purest heart, so never take it so seriuosly regardless of what mess they have created. Just have fun with it, it's kinda entertaining too for us as a seriuos adult :)
I always believe that raising a kid is like painting on a blank canvas. Just like art, there’s never a final result, because there’s no such thing as perfect piece of art, we just need to know when to stop and stare, or to continue and find another stops. And just like art too, how we feel about it will depend on how we shape them, what techniques we’re using and how we love and value them in our life. And just like art, every piece of them are unique. So be proud of whatever they've become.